What Title?
by Hime D
Summary: Teenagers from all over the world dragged into an international university in a small city in Japan. Stories from the POV of a Finnish student.
1. Welcome to College Life!

* * *

"...I wonder if anyone realizes that aside from the Sensei and Berwald, the others in our seminar class come from either the Allies or the Axis nations."

Feliciano tilted his head. "...Si?"

Tino gives his classmate an amused look. "You did learn history in high school, right?"

Feliciano tilted his head to the other side. Tino could almost see the light bulb above his head as it finally clicked for the Italian. "Aaah, from the Second World War. Come to think of it, you're right!"

* * *

"Germany, Germany!"

Ludwig gave Feliciano an annoyed look. "What? And why are you calling me Germany?"

"Guess what! We are the Axis Nations!" Then Feliciano gave him a salute.

To be specific, the Hitler salute.

On retrospection, maybe Tino should have figured that Feliciano would try a stunt like that. It was true that while the Italian wasn't really as stupid as people might thought he was, he was still, err, to put it nicely, somewhat oblivious. So while Feliciano probably deserved that punch on the gut, Tino should have attempted to warn him not to try anything funny.

"He didn't mean bad," Tino tried as they left Feliciano in their seminar room.

"Ach, did he." Ludwig didn't even look convinced for a bit.

* * *

Enrolling in an international college like this was not a bad idea, Tino decided. Granted that he wouldn't have managed to come if Berwald hadn't dragged him across the Earth to this small city in Japan (to date, he still didn't understand why the silent giant did that), but he held no grudge against the Swede.

"'Sup, Tino!" Alfred walked into their dorm's kitchen, half-eaten hamburger in his hand, as usual. "Your husband is looking for ya!"

...He just wished that Berwald would stop referring to him as his wife.

* * *

_**HETALIA!**_

* * *

Their floor's RA was a small Japanese name by the name of Honda Kiku, which also happened to be the member of their seminar class. In fact, most of the residents of floor L3 happens to be a member of the seminar (except for Francis who was stuck in L1, the poor guy), so Tino really should have seen it coming.

"Japan, Japan! Huuuuuug!"

"Vargas-san! Nani o! Let me go!"

"Hey, Italy, you're supposed to attack UK, not your own buddy."

"US, you prat!"

"Finlaaaand, do you want to play war too?"

Tino, or now also known to his dormmates as Finland, started to regret ever mentioning about the nation thing to Feliciano.

* * *

"What do you have?"

Alfred peered into the plastic bag he carried into Toris' room. "Beer, wine, vodka, sake, gin, you name it, I have it."

Tino could almost swear he could hear the bottom of Toris' stomach lurching as Ivan smiled brightly. "It's party time."

* * *

On retrospection, it had been a good idea to evacuate to Ludwig's room at the first line of 'KolKolKol' from Ivan. Tino almost pitied Toris who couldn't run away (it was his room anyway), but kind as Toris was, Tino still preferred to have the possibility to see the daylight tomorrow.

But the bad side of the idea was that, now he was stuck with Ludwig, Feliciano, Lovino, and Roderich.

"You potato head! Hands off my brother!"

"Your bruder is the one groping me, you tomato head!"

"You two, be silent! It is already past midnight! Have you two no etiquette, you idiots?!"

Maybe he should go to Berwald's room instead.

* * *

The next morning.

Ivan was his usual self. Toris, Eduard and Raivis looked completely traumatized. Francis threw a tantrum about not being invited. Kiku avoided Heracles completely. Feliciano got a warning from the dorm's security about running around the dorm naked. Ludwig and Arthur refused to get out of their respective rooms.

Tino himself? Oh, he was just fine, thank you. Though he did wonder why Berwald looked at him funny.

* * *


	2. Of Kanji, Baths, and Chatrooms

* * *

A few weeks into the semester, Tino concluded that whoever invented the kanji must have been a masochist.

Yao begged to differ, but he agreed with his opinion about the kana.

Eduard wondered why they couldn't just let the computer write the kanji for them instead of them having to memorize a few hundreds every semester until their graduation. Technology did exist for a reason, after all.

Francis pointed out that the kanji could be a good inspiration for sex positions.

Arthur kicked him out of the chatroom.

Fortunately, the lecturer paid no attention to Francis when he tried to throw his eraser across the computer room toward Arthur. Unfortunately, the eraser missed, and zeroed at Ivan's head instead.

Everybody pretended not to notice when the Russian dragged the screaming French out of the Information Processing 101 class.

* * *

"Finland, Finland!"

"What is it, Feliciano?"

"I'm making pasta for dinner! Wanna join me?"

"Voi... I don't know, I have to finish Senor Carriedo's essay tonight...."

"But, your husband agreed to come, too!"

...On retrospection, maybe he shouldn't have let Berwald drag him all the way to Japan.

* * *

It was easy to look for Ivan. All Tino had to do is to find the crowdiest spot of the day. Today it happened to be the cafeteria, courtesy of the beginning of the East Asian festival, the first of the series of cultural festivals of their university (which had too many festivals along the year that Tino had to wonder if he had come here to study or to party). It did help that the boy was big enough to be easily spotted even among the crowdiest crowds.

"Such a nice day, da?"

"Indeed."

"It would be nicer if they can start screaming for their life now, though."

Tino sometimes wondered if his friend wasn't just joking, but then again, that was Ivan for you.

* * *

_**HETALIA!**_

* * *

The moment Ludwig entered the bath, all eyes trained on him. Or rather, _discreetly_ trained on him.

Tino watched in amusement as Alfred gave a suprised look while Kiku an embarrassed one.

Then Francis came in.

Alfred blinked in disbelief. Kiku started to look green.

Then Heracles came in.

Alfred openly gaped. Kiku tried to drown himself.

Then Gupta came in.

Tino thought he could hear whatever confidence Alfred had for his manhood crumbling into pieces.

* * *

"Fam'ly."

"Kazoku."

"Fath'r."

"Chichi. Otousan."

"M'th'r."

"Haha. Okaasan."

"H'sband."

"Otto. Danna."

"W'fe."

"Tsuma. ...And, err...."

Berwald's green eyes flickered at him, and it was bscary/b, the way the shadow casted on his face as he loomed over him (it's just the height, Tino told himself, it's just the height!).

"Nyoubo," the Swede then said.

...Somehow it felt like Berwald wasn't just merely telling him the translation.

* * *

Francis had concluded that there was a serious lack of girls in the uni and that was why he had no choice but to start molesting the guys instead.

Arthur proposed that they lock Francis in his room or ship him back to Paris.

Alfred suggested that they just feed Francis Arthur's scones.

Kiku reminded Arthur to be quiet because the public computer room was part of the library, and Berwald, who happened to work part time in the library, was already glaring daggers at him.

Tino informed Kiku that unfortunately, that was Berwald's usual face, not his angry face.

Ivan offered to show them an angry face.

Everybody declined politely.

Feliciano wondered if they would be having pasta for dinner.

* * *

"Germany, Germany!"

Tino could see Ludwig's back tensing up considerably before the man turned toward Feliciano. "What?"

"Veeee, don't be scary like that, or you will get old very fast!"

Ludwig looked like he wanted to strangle the Italian. "What do you want?"

Feliciano gave him a bright smile. "We're going to the city tomorrow. Care to join us? There's Japan, America, England, China, France, and Russia, too!"

Ludwig frowned. "I don't know...."

Feliciano grabbed the German's hand. "Andiamoooooo. It will be fun! Finland, Sweden, Estonia, Lithuania, Latvia, Greece, and Austria are coming too. Even my brother is coming!"

In Tino's opinion, mentioning Lovino, who had made it quite clear earlier that he hated Ludwig, didn't really help in persuading the German to come. But at the end Ludwig gave up anyway and gave his concent. Tino pretended not to notice Ludwig becoming quite flustered when Feliciano hugged him out of joy.

* * *


	3. Of Alcohols and Francis Being Francis

* * *

Elizabeta was a very lovely and smart girl. That, combined with the fact that the female students were half the amount of the male ones, contributed to her status as the unofficial idol of the uni. However, what most of the male population of the uni didn't know was that Elizabeta was also a fangirl.

To be specific, a yaoi fangirl.

"And that is why you want to take pictures of me and Berwald?"

The girl nodded eagerly.

"...I am not Berwald's boyfriend."

"But everyone says you're his wife."

Tino wondered if it would be too rude for him to start swearing up and down in front of the girl.

* * *

The five of them looked among themselves.

It was Ludwig who first spoke up. "I have nothing to do with this."

"But you accepted his challenge," Feliciano pointed out brightly.

"He _challenged_ me. Mich. A German. To a drinking race. Does that not sound like a suicidal act to you?"

Tino couldn't help but snicker. Then he asked something that he had been wondering since the beginning of their problem. "But why Alfred, then?"

Ludwig, Feliciano, Berwald, and Tino turned their heads toward Alfred.

For once, Alfred seemed to be at lost of words. He ended up just giving them a glare.

"I wish I had a camera with me," Feliciano said. "That is sooooo cute."

"I can call Elizabeta," Tino offered.

"Do that and die, Finland," Alfred finally growled. "And can't you get him off me?"

They looked at their problem, Arthur, who was currently clinging on Alfred's lap, sobbing miserably.

Then they looked among themselves.

Then as one, escaped from the room, leaving Alfred and Arthur alone. "Traitors!" was the last word they heard from Alfred that night.

* * *

**From: **francbo0 iu. ac. jp

**To: **alfrejo0 iu. ac. jp; arthuki0 iu. ac. jp; berwaox0 iu. ac. jp; carriedo iu. ac. jp; eduarbo0 iu. ac. jp; elizahe0 iu. ac. jp; felicva0 iu. ac. jp; feliklu0 iu. ac. jp; gilbebe0 iu. ac. jp; guptaha0 iu. ac. jp; heracka0 iu. ac. jp; ivanbr0 iu. ac. jp; kikuho0 iu. ac. jp; lovinva0 iu. ac. jp; ludwibe0 iu. ac. jp; matthwi0 iu. ac. jp; natalar0 iu. ac. jp; sadiqad0 iu. ac. jp; raiviga0 iu. ac. jp; rodered0 iu. ac. jp; tinova0 iu. ac. jp; torislo0 iu. ac. jp; vashzw0 iu. ac. jp; yaowa0 iu. ac. jp; yoonsim0 iu. ac. jp

**Subject: **Newest news

**Time: **30/04/00 03:17

**Attachment: ** http :// pics. livejournal. com / hime1999 / pic / 0016yz0c (52KB)

**Message: **

Mes chers amis,

Hereby I relay to you the latest development between UK and US. Who would have thought that they would go that far?

I wish them all the luck in the world.

Chers UK et US,

You are always welcome to my room for advises and lubes.

Je vous embrasse,

Francis

* * *

_**HETALIA!**_

* * *

_Having hauled himself overnight to Stockholm, the nearest place for the entrance exam, he had been seriously tired enough to almost fall asleep even as he was walking into the exam room. It probably had been a good thing that a scary looking giant was seaten next to him then, because one look from the giant completely woke him up. And made him rethink of the decision of taking the exam that day. _

_But considering he hadn't have enough money to stay for a night, and while he had high resistance to cold weather he seriously didn't think that sleeping in the park in the middle of the winter was a good idea, he braced himself and took the exam. And he did considerably well. Relatively. Maybe. _

_Unfortunately, the combination of lack of sleep and the tension from the five hours examination took its toll the moment he stepped out of the examination room. _

_When he finally woke up, he was looking at an unfamiliar ceiling, lying in an unfamiliar bed, his own clothes were folded on an unfamiliar nightstand, and he was wearing an unfamiliar oversized shirt. _

_And his watch told him that it was two days after the exam. _

_He had been ready to have a panic attack then, when suddenly the door to the unfamiliar room opened and a familiar face came in, in the form of the giant that had seaten next to him during the entrance. _

_And that was how Tino Väinämöinen met Berwald Oxenstierna. _

* * *

The radio whispered.

"Germany to Italy. Do you see any of them?"

"No, Sir! But I saw a cute kitten---"

"Concentrate, Dummkopf!"

"Yessir!"

"Germany to Sweden, what is your status?"

"F'ne."

"...Could you make it more specific? Like, your position and which enemy is on your peripheral?"

"N'r entr'nce. UK and US, arg'ing. Shoot?"

"...Shoot at will."

"R'ger."

"Germany to Finland."

"Moi, moi."

"Remind me to ask the Sensei why we are having paint ball for seminar class."

"Roger that, Germany."

* * *

"It's your fault."

"My bloody fault? You're the one who kept being fucking loud and all when we were supposed to be all secretive."

"How should I know that Sweden was around?!"

"That's the bloody point of being secretive, you bloody git!"

Tino watched in amusement. "I thought the class was supposed to be promoting the world peace."

Yao sipped on his tea calmly. "No knowing peace without knowing war."

Tino glanced at Francis, whose entire body had gotten covered by blue paints five minutes into the game, courtesy of both Alfred and Arthur, despite them being in the same team. And who was, despite the predicament, still managed to point at the two boys and laugh. And subsequently got beaten up by them.

"Peace, ei?"

"It is a peaceful day," Kiku remarked.

Berwald, Ludwig, and Feliciano nodded in agreement.

Guess Tino would have to agree too.

* * *

AN: ...yes, that link upthere? Ish a pic. :D


	4. Of Pink Dyes and Worcestershire Sauce

* * *

As many of the students of the university would find out later, managing to anger one Arthur Kirkland was easy, but never a good idea. Managing to anger one Alfred F. Jones could pretty much instantly award them the Internet.

But managing to anger both of them at the same time?

Better write your will right now.

* * *

"France-niichan! What happened to your hair?"

Tino looked up from his porrige and was immediately treated to the sight of a half naked Francis with only a towel covering his lower parts and with a completely new hair color instead of his usual blond.

Pink color, to be precise.

Francis didn't look as amused as he was, unfortunately. He was holding a bottle of shampoo, and asked Feliciano slowly. "Where's US and UK?"

"Vee, they already left for the first period," the Italian said. "What's wrong?"

Tino was really tempted to laugh there and then, but two things stopped him. One, it would be heartless to laugh at Francis plight, since the man obviously priced his bodily assets. Two, Francis was currently giving him murderous looks, as if daring him to comment. So Tino just pretended to be busy with his breakfast instead.

* * *

After the incident with the pink dye that morning, Francis still turned up for their Japanese class in his usual blond hair, surprisingly, making Tino wonder if Francis really was a real blonde. Considering that the dorm was at least half an hour away from the city, the only plausible explanation for that miracle was that either somebody was kindly enough to lend France a blonde dye that happened to look exactly like his usual hair color (Vash? Feliks?), or Francis actually had supplies of them in his room.

...Nothing to do with Tino, though. He should be concentrating on the class instead. But after years of trying to master Swedish and English at the same time, Tino wondered if his brain would have enough space for another language.

"Hey, Tino!"

Tino glanced back toward Francis, who seemed to be somehow... nervous? "Moi?"

"You see that girl?"

"Natalya?"

"Non, non. The girl with the long hair."

But Natalya had long hair.... "Elizabeta?"

"Non. The one peeking at us from the window!"

Tino blinked. Then turned toward the window. And blinked again. "What girl?"

Francis looked even more nervous. "That girl!"

"I don't see any girl."

"...Oh."

Tino could only blink as Francis slowly turned downright pale.

* * *

After a while, it became a routine for the residents of floor L3 to see Francis stomping angrily to their floor every day.

After the pink dye in the shampoo bottle, the next appearance came from the famed Worcestershire sauce in Francis' vinegar bottle, resulting in the French screaming high hell about UK, the devil, and ruining one's cooking.

The next day, Francis showed up with red eyes, because apparently somebody laced his soft lense cleaner ever so slightly with tabasco.

The next day, he got pizza delivery enough to feed the whole dorm but himself, because he happened to hate wasabi (on how the Japanese managed to use wasabi as a topping in pizza, Tino would never understand, but ah well).

The next day, it was sushi.

And so on, and so on.

And everyday, Francis looked more and more paranoid, mumbling to himself about a girl who kept following him around.

* * *

_**HETALIA!**_

* * *

Tino had finally finished Carriedo-sensei's paper when Francis' scream could be heard around the dorm. By the time he and Berwald arrived at floor L1, the dorm's security guard was was already pounding at the French's door. It didn't take long for Francis to storm out of his room, screaming and babbling in French. Of course, this only served to confuse everyone present.

Fortunately, Vash Zwingly happened to be in the lobby during the commotion, and was curious enough to come to L1 to see what was going one. He listened to Francis trying to explain his situation, and with more exlanations, the Swiss grew more and more irritated. And the end, he turned to security and said in perfect Japanese, "O-bake wo mita sou de aru."

Tino processed the words in his brain and came up with the translation: Francis had seen a ghost.

Tino glanced at Berwald, who was looking at the scene with his usual expression, which was near to none. Then sighed. "Shall we go back?" he asked.

Berwald glanced back at Tino and nodded.

They took the stairs to go back to the third floor, and just so happened to be walking behind Arthur and Alfred, who interestingly seemed to be in a good mood (as a testament to that, for once, they actually didn't try to rip each other's throat).

"I conceed," Tino heard the American said to his English friend. "She must be very good at scaring the bejeezus out of people, to reduce France into that. What was her name again?"

Arthur just smirked at Alfred. "Okiku, but she goes by Sadako, too. Count yourself lucky I never sic her at you."

Laughing nervously, Alfred held his hands up in surrender. "Alright. But how did you meet her again?"

Arthur just smirked.

Tino blinked. Then glanced at Berwald, who glanced back at him.

And Berwald actually snorted.

* * *

It was the day after the midnight incident, in front of the whole uni, right in the middle of the cafeteria.

"I'm sorry!"

Arthur leaned forward. "Pardon? I don't think I heard you quite right."

"I'm sorry! Désolé! Je suis désolé! Je vous demande pardon!"

Alfred gave out a dramatic sigh. "Aww, man. Give him a break. After all, he just made us look like gays." For once, sarcasm was practically dripping from the American's words. "He won't do that again, won't he?"

Francis shook his head eagerly.

"After all, heroes are forgiving! As long as the culprits won't try anything funny in the near future, right?"

Francis nodded his head eagerly.

"Better make it forever," Arthur deadpanned.

Francis nodded his head even more eagerly. But Tino could swear that he saw the French crossing his fingers behind his back.

* * *

"Just wondering, if you don't mind." Tino asked out of curiosity. "What did happen then?"

Alfred shrugged offhandedly. "UK puked on his shirt. I didn't want my room to smell like the sewage, so I thought I could get rid of the shirt and let him be naked. His own fucking fault to get drunk at the first place."

"I see."

Tino didn't think he should ask why Alfred's shirt had been open as well then. Some things were better left in the dark.

* * *


	5. Of Bears and Idiots

* * *

It was a common knowledge in the university that to find Berwald, one would only have to find Tino. Of course, that wasn't exactly true because Tino did have several classes that the Swede didn't take.

The same could be applied to Knud Christiansen. Contrary to popular belief, the Dane did not hang around Inge Nygaardsvold twenty four seven. Maybe just twelve seven. Or twelve six. Depending on whether the Norwegian could find a way to lose the Dane. Like today.

"Inge?"

"Yes?"

"You do realize that sooner later Knud would realize that you've been hiding here whenever you can."

Inge just shrugged, not even looking up from the book he was reading. "He won't be looking for me here. It's Björn's room."

Tino scratched the back of his head, glancing rather confusedly at Berwald, the owner of the romm who just shrugged and continued with his knitting.

* * *

"Minnaaaa, ohayoooo. Kyou ha ee tenki ya naaaa!"

Everyone. Good morning. Today was... something weather something. He thought.

"Mon Dieu," next to him Francis heaved a sigh. "I still wish Monsieur Carriedo would stop using random Japanese. Not everybody here can understand it."

"He's really good at it, don't you think?" Tino pondered outloud.

"Only because he spent the last ten years of his life in Osaka."

"Aa, no wonder." Tino turned around toward Kiku, who was sitting behind him. "That explains the Kansai dialect."

Kansai. Western part of Japan. Osaka, Kyoto, and Nara. "I wonder what he did there."

"Ola, soko!"

Tino, Francis, and Kiku turned toward the Spaniard sensei.

"Jugyou-chuu ni shigo dame ya neeeen," Carriedo-sensei said. Tino thought he was trying to admonish them, but it really could have been more effective if he weren't using yet more random Japanese. Let's see... 'Jugyou'. Lecture. 'Chuu'. Middle. 'Dame'. Not good. ...'Shigo'? What on earth was 'shigo'?

As if voicing his confusion, France raised his hand and drawled. "Sensheeeei. Nihongo, wakarimasheeeen."

"Eeee? Nande ya nen! You guys have been here for a few months!" Carriedo-sensei insisted. "You must have picked up some Nihongo by now."

"Pardon moi for not being le genius in lingua," Francis drawled again. "It's not like Japanese is the only subject we are taking here too."

"But you surely could understand basic conversation, yarou?"

"Probably if you don't use some obscure dialect with us."

"But Kansai-ben is not obscure at all!"

While Francis and Carriedo-sensei started to get involved in a rather heated debate about local dialects (which later proved to last until the bell rang), Feliciano, who was sitting in front of Tino, turned and asked brightly, "So, what's for lunch? I heard they serve Napolitan today."

Tino couldn't help but snort.

* * *

_**HETALIA!**_

* * *

"Hej, Tino! Fancy seeing you here."

"Moi, Knud. Fancy seeing you here too."

"Say, you don't happen to see Inge, do you?"

"No." Tino really didn't see Inge, though he could guess where the Norwegian might be.

The Dane sighed out loud. "Fuck. I wonder if he's with that stupid bear again."

"Bear? You mean--"

"Yeah, Björn. The stupid teddy bear."

While Tino knew that his Swedish friend was aptly nicknamed Björn by their Scandinavian friends, to hear someone associating that Berwald Oxenstierna with a teddy bear was a bit... surreal. He could understand mountain bear, grizzly bear, polar bear, or even a panda bear, but a teddy bear? "Why would you think so?"

"Oh, Inge has done that forever. I mean, ever since we're back in the gymnasium." At Tino's blank look, Knud supplied. "The gymnasium. The three of us went to the same gym."

...Oh. Tino didn't know that. ...And it explained a lot, really. "So Inge has always had the habit of...."

"Going to Björn's room whenever he can. I mean, I could understand it then since they were dating back then, but now---"

"Wait, wait, wait, what?" Tino interupted the Dane. "Inge and Berwald were dating?"

"Back in the second year, yeah."

"...You mean Berwald really is gay?"

Knud blinked at him. Then asked, "Aren't you his current boytoy?"

* * *

_It was one week before Tino's scheduled flight to Japan, and Tino lost his family in a car crash. _

_Berwald was there at the funeral, standing rather apart from the other mourners. Tino didn't have the time to wonder how and why the Swede whom he barely knew was even there; he had more urgent matter to think about, like the funeral itself, the stream of mourners that kept giving him pitying looks, or like whether he should go to Japan or not after all. _

_"C'me," Berwald said after the funeral. _

_Tino shook his head. "I don't know. I doubt I will be able to afford going. It makes better sense if I just stay and find a job while going to the local univesity." _

_"C'me," Berwald still said, and he looked so scary that Tino nearly cowed in. _

_"I- I-- The scholarship didn't exactly cover everything, you know...." _

_"C'me," Berwald still said, and Tino nearly pissed his pants. But it surprised him when the Swede continued and said, "I'll cov'r everythin' f'r ye." _

_Tino couldn't help asking why. _

_"I'll be yer family fr'm now on," Berwald simply said. _

_Tino could only gape at him. Then the next thing he knew, Berwald's long arms were around him, pressing him against the Swede's broad chest, and Tino stayed there until his breath no longer ragged and his hands stop shaking._

_The next day, Tino packed everything he had and left his hometown with Berwald._

* * *

"Knud Christiansen?"

Nobody answered.

The lecturer looked up, adjusting the glasses perched on his nose. "Is Knud Christiansen present?"

Tino raised his hand. "He's in infirmary. I think he broke his nose."

"Oh. Accident?"

Tino smiled innocently. "Something like that."

* * *


End file.
